Thursday, April 18, 2013

Most Humble Apoligies

Good Morning Everyone,

I must first say that I am so very sorry for being so MIA for a while.  It has been so very stressful with my parents, and other life issues going on that I just have not even turned on the computer except for some banking issues.  This has been a learning experience and it has been something that I will not wish on anyone.
I will try to post toward the weekend. I said that I was going to post on my dad's illness and the experiences with the health care system, which I will tell you that its not good and will not get better.  It is Obamacare and its bad for everyone.  It is a joke, and a smoke and mirrors set up, so head's up with this.  Also, some GOOD news,  my dad is home, and is doing good for the shape he was in.  This will be a part of my post also, getting him home from the nursing home with the Obamacare crap that I had to go through.  My dad had a health set back, a bad bacterial infection from the nursing home that almost killed him, and the terrible care he received from two  care centers,  boy, care center, what an oxy-moron that is.
Dad has several health issues along with the stroke, but we will cross each one as we can and when he gets stronger, until then, its a daily deal. My mother is dealing with early onset dementia, and she is very difficult to deal with now.  She lives in her own little bubble complete with imaginary things, but I just roll my eyes and just play along, as if you confront her with her little world, she blows and is very hard to handle.  I have home health come in to check on my Dad, but they are not real happy about that either, but I have to until I can get Dad better and he is able to function better.  He really is doing so much better than he was, he has to re-learn some things, and learn to work his limbs better, but he thinks clear, somewhat, he does have issues with remembering the days, as he lost about two months, but he is getting up, and is trying to be able to make breakfast for himself so I can have a break.  I stop in during the morning to make sure he takes his med's, and I bring in lunch or dinner before evening, so I can have a peaceful evening and rest as I need this time to myself.

Also, on my end, D and I found a very nice home, and in all of this turmoil, we closed and have been moving things as we can, the weather here is crappy, snow, cold, ice and what ever else can come up, but we managed with all of the turmoil to do this also.  I did not want to say anything, as we were not sure that everything would go through and I did not want my hopes to get too high along with everything else.
I also am still dealing with the moron who owns the park, my attorney is handling that issue and is keeping the peace with this.  I do not have time to fight.

At this point in time, I am just numb with everything.  I should be so happy and elated with the home, but I'm not. I have had so much stress, and decisions, that I am just numb.I am being drug from my household duties and then I have to do my parents household duties also, so my time is pulled from all sides.   My Dad wants to see the house, but I am so very leery to show my Mom, as her mental state is not good, and she may go native on me, and hate me even more than she does now.  She has issues with me doing things in the house now, and moving things and interfering with her house.  I am now the "hated" daughter as I have been told will or would happen, and there is not much I can do about it. I will have to think about this with some thought.
I will post more on moving, at this moment, I am just moving household things, dishes, and small stuff, and I am going through everything and tossing what I do not want, and making a pile for donations to the thrift shops.  Before we actually closed, we brought in a dumpster and threw away a ton and a half of crap and stuff that was not needed.  Most of this was outside stuff that I just did not need and to be honest, I am just not sure where it came from.  But it  is gone now, and it is a relief.
This home is very close to the city limits, but I am still in the community, and in a very nice, quiet neighborhood.  I have a garden area, a raised bed about 14 x 14.  It is a start.  I have a nice yard, and room for some dwarf fruit trees eventually.  The yard is nice and the back yard has a patio area, and much potential, and is along a large 20 acre pasture, so at the moment, I do not have anyone in the back except this pasture.  Eventually, homes will be built, but until then, its nice, and has birds, and most important, quiet.

So, I just wanted to jump in and let you all know that I am still here, some days, I do not want to wake up, or be here.  Some days, I do not want to face the unknown temperament of my parents, or their demands.  I am not sure of the future, if I will even have a life, or be able to enjoy my home at all.  Everything is just in the air at the moment, and very unknown.
I also want to thank Flowerlady for emailing me and checking on me.  I love you my friend, and concerns, I am hanging in there, and I will try to get off an email to you later this weekend.  This is what angers me, as I cannot get to my life and do what I want to do now, I have no  time for me, so I will just try to touch base with everyone through this blog and emails until things hopefully calm down.

Until later, I wish everyone a wonderful up coming weekend, get lots done, enjoy the weather, if you have nice weather, and just enjoy your life, as you never know what the day will bring.

Love and Hugs to All